About Throwback Photos & Throwback Seasons…

My friend sent me a throw back photo from 2013. He was yabbing me about the way my mouth was shaped in the picture. I was dancing in the photo so I guess my mouth was simply aligning with the rhythm. My mouth and hands usually play a huge role in my amazing dance moves 😉 …

But, I digress…

Although my friend was out to make fun of me, I was more focused on how on fleek my hair looked in the picture 😁 See for yourself below…

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I said to myself “hey, maybe I should rock this hair style again”. Well, I’ve not yet decided if I’d do the hairstyle but the thought got me thinking (yeah, a whole lot of thinking going on 😀 )

We sometimes think we can liken different seasons in our lives to hairstyles. Like something we can “rock” again. But does it really work that way? Is it possible to have a season re-run? Is it very likely to re-live a past season?

Here’s what I think: seasons come and go. One season is usually different from the next. They may be some similarities between 2 seasons but I believe some unique characteristics stand out. If I wanted, I could do the exact same hairstyle I had in that picture and thus experience the exact same feelings I experienced 5 years ago in that picture. But can I experience my pre-wife season now that I’ve been married for 6 years? I don’t think so…

This made me think that instead of focusing on the pleasure (or pain) in past seasons or being fixated on the coming seasons, I should just really live in the season that I am in now. You know why? I think doing otherwise would cause me to miss out on the major fruits I can reap from this season.

I don’t want to miss the growth, lessons and moments I can derive from my present season. I want to live in the pleasure and pain, the highs and lows, the victories and detours. I believe all of these concretize to form the stepping stones that I would ascend to arrive at my future season.

What do you think? 🙂

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Shooting Love Arrows your way…

Hi there! 😀

Sooooo, this is me shooting a Love Arrow your way…

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Position yourself well o. You’d be lucky to get shot by this arrow! 😀

I guess we all know that Love is expressed in various ways; giving being one of them. Therefore, I’d like to express my love to you by gifting you something fabulous this “Season of Love”. Just because y’all are the real MVPs 😉

Here’s what’s up for grabs

ankara t-shirt  patch skirt patch dress

You like? 😀

To win, simply do the following:

  • Follow me on Instagram by clicking here (that’s if you’re not following already). If you don’t have an IG account, open one and then follow me! hehehe
  • In the comments’ section here below, tell me your favorite love song(s). Only comments on this blog post count!

PS: The winner will be randomly selected and contacted thereafter to claim his/her prize.

  • A male winner gets the Ankara Patch Tee-Shirt
  • A female winner gets the Ankara Patch Skirt
  • If the winner has a daughter (from 6 months – 12 years old), he/she can opt for the Ankara Patch Dress from our fashion line!
  • This giveaway is open until February 13, 2018.

That’s it! Simple as ABC…

I’d love to know what your favorite love song is. Mine is “Stay With You” by John Legend (Mine and Le Hubs’ song 😉 ). What’s yours?

XOXO Related image

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Thursday Two-Liner #48

When you say “yes” to comparing,

You say “no” to being awesome…

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Thursday Two-Liner #47

Instead of striving for perfection…

Aim to be better than you were yesterday

small steps

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Thursday Two-Liner #46

Be yourself.

But, always your best self…

Image result for your best self

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Who’s the real MVP?

I am an Arsenal FC fan by marriage. After I said “I do” to a certain fine young man, I adopted his surname and many other things including the football club he supports- Arsenal

I never really cared for football before I met the hubs because I never saw the sense in grown men chasing after an inflated rubber. It was too sweaty and frankly, quite boring. But old things have passed away. In fact, I can now comfortably hold a conversation about football players and the rules governing the game. Things we do for love eh? 🙂

I had an interesting chat with my friend the other night. Let’s call her Mrs O. I was hailing her on her arrangee skills. You know all those people you can allow to handle/organize any event/party/catering/gift buying while you go to sleep? Yeah, that’s Mrs. O… I call her The Fixer. When I want party favours for my daughter’s birthday party? Mrs. O to the rescue. I want suggestions for a nice gift to get my pastor? Mrs. O has it covered. I want referrals on where I can get quality ankara fabrics at a reasonable price? Mrs. O can handle it. I want a big bowl of ofada sauce? Small thing for Mrs. O. Yup! 😀 So I was just twale-ing for her as per some major organizing she did recently and she responded that it (organizing) was her talent and how she sometimes envies my writing skills.

Wiped out as I was, a light bulb came on and 3 letters came to mind: M V P*

Coincidentally, a football match was showing on TV.. Roma was flogging Chelsea 3-0. Hehehe, I just had to chip that in (petty, I know). Anyways, I was thinking of the beautiful concept of team work and how this idea of MVP tarnishes it.

I culled (from kwese.espn.com) the following statement from Arsene Wenger to help explain my thoughts: “I am against it (MVP) because I think it gets in the head of players. We have seen many people only thinking about themselves because they are obsessed by the Ballon d’Or and not by the team performance, and I believe football is a collective sport and we live already in a world where everything is individualized. We want to respect what football is about, first about the team effort.”

Thank you jare baba Wenger. I may not agree with some things you do/say, but I agree with this one 100%.

Now in response to Mrs O’s reference to my writing skills, I told her that we all have our different gifts. No one is more important than the other. We all complement one another. This is what makes the world colourful and beautiful. Imagine if everyone in the world was a writer or a fashion designer or a fixer like Mrs O? Me thinks the world would be very bland indeed. You know what would be more interesting? I’d write something the fashion designer would enjoy reading. Then she would make me a dress which I would wear to slay at an owambe organized by Mrs. O. See? All the dots connect this way and it makes more sense because then there will be people that actually benefit from your gift.

The way I see it, this notion of MVP is a no-no because it leads to…

  • Overestimation of self and trivialization of the talents of others. Where one sees one’s self as the best thing since sliced bread, indispensable and in a nutshell, better than others. No, I do not agree that Messi (or CR7) is the *G.O.A.T (coman beat me) because without the other players in the team, they would not be able to score goals.
  • The comparison trap where one tends to see other people’s talents as better than theirs and wish they had ” more ghen ghen” skills. Here, a sense of inferiority thrives.

Even Mother Nature opposes the MVP model. Truth is, nature thrives on interdependency. There is no MVP. Rain is not more valuable than sunlight when it comes to rainbow formation. Neither is a spermatozoon more valuable than an ovum for a foetus to be made. These elements complement each other to create something beautiful. That’s the way it works. Let’s take a cue. Why do humans like to complicate things sef?

So my dear friend, do not think you have nothing to offer the world. God didn’t make anyone talentless. That gift of yours you’re despising is needed by someone else as a solution to a problem. You too are the real MVP joor. Also, my dear CR7 sorry, my other dear friend, the world does not revolve around you. Biko, come down off that high horse. It’s not that serious you hear?

We are all good at different things and that’s OK. So, here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to take the M out of the MVP, OK? Thank you very much.

So….

mvp

Everyone is valuable. Full stop. C’e’st fini.

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What Music Genre Are You?


I’m learning not to be a *yessy person these days… this is coming from a chronic ex-people pleaser. I’m learning how to say no these days and not feel guilty about it. I’m learning to decline tasks and invitations that would disrupt my plans or add stress to my already long to-do list. I am learning to create my own music and dance to it without any reservation.

Let me give you a recent example of the exhibition of the new me…the *un-yessy Lahmeet. The other day, my colleague sent a survey to the rest of us to complete. Now for the records, I hate surveys especially the ones that ask open ended questions. You can call me a lazy survey filler because I’d rather the multi-choice ones… I just can’t be bothered to crack my head to supply feedback about topics that I’m likely not even interested in. So, you can imagine my “joy” when I saw her email. I opened the survey and there were several open ended questions. Ha! I promptly closed the thing with a not-today-satan resolve. To top it up, I was even busy sef …proper excuse to decline (I know, I know… I’m still working on getting to the point where I don’t feel I need to have/supply a reason for saying no). Like 30mins or so later, she walked up to my desk…

Colleague: Hi Anita. Did you see my email? Have you done the survey?
Me: No I haven’t… I’m working on a report (Still WIP guys… bear with me)
*** Another 30mins later***
Colleague: Anita, how far? Have you done it?
Me: No, and I’m not going to (OK I actually didn’t say the “I’m not going to” part out loud but hey, it was implied)
(crickets….my expression is as sober as a judge’s while she smiles)
Me: Why are you smiling?
Colleague: Nothing… I’m just wondering why people are not responding favourably to taking the survey (the ex-yessy Lahmeet would have given in at this point…)
***Curtain closes on dialogue***

I know I am still work in progress but I am proud of how well I resisted the urge to pull out the former yessy me. I pat myself on the back for not allowing my colleague’s jazz to shatter my rock. You see, the fact is that people will sometimes come with their own music and demand you switch off yours to listen to theirs. You don’t have to, you know? You can put your foot down and continue playing yours. The disjointed medley would force them to carry their wahala music away and leave you to enjoy yours in peace. And even if they prove stubborn and refuse to leave, you can whip out your earphones, plug in and tune them out!

But, I should also state that some people’s music may compliment yours… It is possible to have a blend of different music types… I think Linkin’ Park’s numb which is a fusion of rock and rap is pretty cool. In the same way, another person’s music may blend with yours to create the ultimate remix…The person’s presence in your life makes it richer and better. If so, it’s OK to entertain them. If not, biko carry on with your smashing music. Refuse any discordant music in your life, know and stick to your preferred genre of music and rock on!

Peace out!

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