I’m learning not to be a *yessy person these days… this is coming from a chronic ex-people pleaser. I’m learning how to say no these days and not feel guilty about it. I’m learning to decline tasks and invitations that would disrupt my plans or add stress to my already long to-do list. I am learning to create my own music and dance to it without any reservation.
Let me give you a recent example of the exhibition of the new me…the *un-yessy Lahmeet. The other day, my colleague sent a survey to the rest of us to complete. Now for the records, I hate surveys especially the ones that ask open ended questions. You can call me a lazy survey filler because I’d rather the multi-choice ones… I just can’t be bothered to crack my head to supply feedback about topics that I’m likely not even interested in. So, you can imagine my “joy” when I saw her email. I opened the survey and there were several open ended questions. Ha! I promptly closed the thing with a not-today-satan resolve. To top it up, I was even busy sef …proper excuse to decline (I know, I know… I’m still working on getting to the point where I don’t feel I need to have/supply a reason for saying no). Like 30mins or so later, she walked up to my desk…
Colleague: Hi Anita. Did you see my email? Have you done the survey?
Me: No I haven’t… I’m working on a report (Still WIP guys… bear with me)
*** Another 30mins later***
Colleague: Anita, how far? Have you done it?
Me: No, and I’m not going to (OK I actually didn’t say the “I’m not going to” part out loud but hey, it was implied)
(crickets….my expression is as sober as a judge’s while she smiles)
Me: Why are you smiling?
Colleague: Nothing… I’m just wondering why people are not responding favourably to taking the survey (the ex-yessy Lahmeet would have given in at this point…)
***Curtain closes on dialogue***
I know I am still work in progress but I am proud of how well I resisted the urge to pull out the former yessy me. I pat myself on the back for not allowing my colleague’s jazz to shatter my rock. You see, the fact is that people will sometimes come with their own music and demand you switch off yours to listen to theirs. You don’t have to, you know? You can put your foot down and continue playing yours. The disjointed medley would force them to carry their wahala music away and leave you to enjoy yours in peace. And even if they prove stubborn and refuse to leave, you can whip out your earphones, plug in and tune them out!
But, I should also state that some people’s music may compliment yours… It is possible to have a blend of different music types… I think Linkin’ Park’s numb which is a fusion of rock and rap is pretty cool. In the same way, another person’s music may blend with yours to create the ultimate remix…The person’s presence in your life makes it richer and better. If so, it’s OK to entertain them. If not, biko carry on with your smashing music. Refuse any discordant music in your life, know and stick to your preferred genre of music and rock on!
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